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10 Lessons I Have Learned as a Rancher’s Wife

March 2, 2014 by Allison


There are a lot of things that I have learned while I have been a rancher’s wife.  Some have been from my own experiences and some have been from fellow ranch wives.  I guess the most important thing I have learned is to just live it and love it!  Here are a few other tips I have figured out along the way…

1.  You must always consult the cowboys when you are picking your due date (like you can really decide what day you are going to give birth, right?!).  You should never have babies during calving, branding, spring turnout, haying, fall gather, weaning, or preg checking seasons.

2.  Once you do find an acceptable time to have a baby (or you have come to some compromise to manage having a baby in the midst of the chaos) expect to hear 9 months’ worth of cow pregnancy related jokes.  I wish I had a buck for every time I heard The Rancher tell me he was bringing the chains, just in case.

3.  Cowboys work much better on full bellies.  It is in your own best interest to learn how to feed the masses.  It should include meat and potatoes.  Always.

4.  There are days that The Rancher has to leave the ranch for some project, but is absolutely sure that he will be back in time for lunch.  I still send him with the lunchbox.  Fate has it that when I DO send a lunch they will be home on time for lunch.  But when I don’t, everything goes wrong and it turns out to be a long and hungry day.

5.  During the busy season (which could be ANY day), your Friday night date might just be a tractor ride or a ride through the cows.  And he does appreciate that you are there for more than getting the gate for him.

6.  Never do something once that you don’t want to be asked to do again.  That advice was given by my mother and mother-in-law- one that didn’t want to be the one to milk the cow (even though she grew up on a dairy) and one that didn’t want run the swather.  Both brilliant women!
7.  When you go out with the cowboys, be sure to load your horse in the trailer last.  That means you will unload first, giving you enough time to be on and ready so that you don’t get left behind.
8.  If ever you get yelled at while you are out helping, it is a sign of real love, not the lack of.  He is yelling at you to save your life, so don’t take the time to make him say it in a nicer or way or to say please.   Just do what he says.


9.  The faithful ranch dog is more than just a dog, and therefore is entitled to privileges, including riding in your car, coming in your house (both happen no matter what condition he is in), and having a place to sit with the rest of the family on the already squished 4-wheeler.  And just face the fact that he will be in at least one family picture (you just don’t have to put that up one on the wall).

10.  Always keep one cowboy around the ranch because destiny will have it that when your best helper is 3, the cows, horses, bulls, or chickens will get out.  It’s likely that with them all being gone they have taken all of the 4-wheelers too and all you have left to chase them in with is the riding lawn mower.

BONUS(because I love you!)
Remember that a rancher is on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, ALL year.  That includes nights, because that’s when you get a call from the state police that you have cows on the freeway.  Or the boss calls for help because the calves are on their way into town at midnight.  It also includes Sundays (the one day a week you try to slow down), because it seems that the range water always goes out just after church.  It includes special days, like when you have just had a new baby.  Sometimes the boss calls to haul spuds that day.  And it certainly includes the days and nights of freezing temperatures when the rest of the world heads in.  Just be sure to be ready with something hot for when they come back to the house!

There are so many more I could share, and I will someday.  Life is never dull as a rancher’s wife.  It’s our job to just take what comes our way and work with it.  I love the lessons I learn from being The Rancher’s Wife!
 

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Comments

  1. A Kansas Farm Mom says

    March 23, 2014 at 9:12 pm

    I LOVE the honesty and truth in this post. I agree wholeheartedly with every thought! Thank you for sharing it on the Country Fair Blog Party. I hope you'll join us again next week, because I can't wait to read more of your posts.

  2. crookedbrandranch says

    March 24, 2014 at 12:47 am

    There is so much truth to this! I love #8…been there! lol -Lori

  3. Kay (A Ranch Mom) says

    March 25, 2014 at 8:19 pm

    True story! 🙂

  4. Darren Lanphere says

    July 29, 2015 at 10:06 pm

    Hi Allison! That is a really eye-opening but likewise witty post on being a Rancher's wife. A woman has to be very supportive of her husband's work and livelihood. I really admire your patience and understanding. But don't get me wrong, I do think that your life as a Rancher's wife is fun as well. There are many women who would like to live in a ranch like you, for it means fresh natural air, milk, cheese, and lots of horse riding to do! I am so excited to read your next posts. Until next time!

    Darren Lanphere @ MirrRanchGroup.com

  5. Lauren says

    April 12, 2017 at 4:29 pm

    Love this! This is so true and I can defiantly relate. I am a rancher's wife and thankful for all he does, although it can be hard at times such as during calving season when they are never home. We just have to be thankful for how blessed we are to have such strong and hard working men in our lives!

Hello! I'm Allison, The Rancher's Wife! There's nothing I love more than being out on the ranch with my husband and kids. Join me for a look at what goes on here at the ranch and the life being a rancher's wife!

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Hello! I'm Allison, The Rancher's Wife! There's nothing I love more than being out on the ranch with my husband and kids. Join me for a look at what goes on here at the ranch and the life being a rancher's wife!

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theidahorancherswife

Idaho ranch wife + mama 🐮🤠
Living on cattle, cocoa & kids running wild.
Daily ranch life, western style all with a side of dirt.

Headed down to the desert this morning and had the Headed down to the desert this morning and had the best day branding. 

Sunshine ✔️
Roping✔️
Great food✔️
NO wind ✔️
The best people ✔️

We kicked off branding season in the best way and I can’t wait for next week. 

Be ready for a photo dump and stories to come!! (Also, I had a chance to pull out my new telephoto lens for some fun photos today 📸)

#lifeonacattleranch 
#marriedtoarancher
#brandingseason
#brandingontherange
#cownoysandcowgirls
“Hello, Ladies,” said in a low, sultry voice. The “Hello, Ladies,” said in a low, sultry voice. The most subtle pick up line from the Old Spice commercials, of all places. 

We may be in the middle of dropping this years’ calves but that doesn’t mean we aren’t prepping for next year already. 

Bull turnout will be here before we know out which means we need to have enough herd bulls heathy, strong, and range ready to breed cows all summer long. 

For months we have been testing, doctoring, and buying bulls ready. With the last of them being delivered any day now, we will get everything branded, tagged and ready for their final inspection. 

There’s still a little time before turnout, but everything is lining up. Bulls getting ready, cows getting close…
And somewhere in the back of your mind, you can already hear it—
“Hello, ladies.”

#lifeonacattleranch 
#marriedtoarancher 
#bullsofinstagram 
#helloladies 
#ranchlife
You ever feel like you’re being watched while you You ever feel like you’re being watched while you work… ?😅
We had a full panel of judges today, watching every move we made, and I’m sure they were thinking things like “we’re watching you,” “why are you doing that” and “don’t mess this up!”

And honestly… they’re not wrong.

Because whether it’s giving a calf the little extra boost it needs, or raising a boy to step in, work hard, and figure things out—this stuff matters. It’s not always smooth, and we don’t always get it perfect, but it’s worth getting right.

The herd might have a lot more eyes on me, but it’s the eyes from my husband, my kids and the others that are counting on me. Good thing for a lot of love and grace!

Today I’m pretty sure we passed inspection, though. Jury’s still out. 🐄👀

•	#lifeonacattleranch
•	#marriedtoarancher
•	#ranchlife
•	#ranchkids
•	#judgedbycows
Dear Mother Nature, I’ve been skeptical of the we Dear Mother Nature, 
I’ve been skeptical of the weather and your intentions for months now. Could life really be this sunny and warm? 🥰🤔

But now that the calendar has actually flipped to spring, I’m feeling more confident and hopeful that this is here to last. 🥹

Now, that doesn’t mean you should drop snow on us just because I’m relaxing into it, although that still would be part of an Idaho spring. 🤪🤣

We could use a touch rain. The moisture we have had has done so much good but it won’t last long. 🙏🏻

As ranchers we put a lot of faith and trust in you to take care of us. Don’t let us down. Not there’s a lot we can do in revenge or anything 🫩😮‍💨🤣. 

Sincerely, 
A ranch wife pulling out the short sleeves and officially putting away the snow clothes. 

Ps- it seems like you always struggle to know how much wind to share our way. Please error on the side of too little. 

#lifeonacattleranch 
#marriedtoarancher 
#DearMotherNature 
#RanchLife 
#SpringVibes
Please tell me not the only one… I’m starting to Please tell me not the only one… 

I’m starting to realize I live in a constant state of being in the wrong place… while also being exactly where I’m supposed to be.

At a basketball game? Thinking about what’s happening on the ranch.
Out on the ranch? Thinking about the laundry, the schedule, or where I’m supposed to be next.

Turns out nothing on a ranch waits for you. Not the cows, not the weather, not the work.

And unfortunately, the rest of life doesn’t either.

I used to think if I just planned things better, I could keep up with all of it.

Now I’m realizing that was wildly… optimistic. 🤣🤪

So these days I just do my best to show up where I am, try not to think too hard about what I’m missing somewhere else, and trust it’ll all still be there when I get back.

(Some days I’m better at that than others.)

Give me an AMEN IF you’ve ever felt like you’re supposed to be in two places at once 

#lifeonacattleranch
#marriedtoarancher
#ranchlife
#womeninagriculture
#momlife
“Are you coming out?” Those have to be some of my “Are you coming out?”

Those have to be some of my favorite words.
Around here, they translate to I love you, for sure.

In this busy season of life, I feel pulled in so many directions—kids’ activities, service opportunities, community involvement, my dreams, housework… the list never really ends.

I’ll admit, I struggle with the balance of what I should do and what I want to do.
And most days, what I want is to be out ranching.

But because it’s a “want,” it can feel selfish.

But if he wants me out there working alongside him, then that becomes my priority.

He’s making space and time for me…
and I’m not about to overlook that.

#lifeonacattleranch
#marriedtoarancher
#ranchlife
#womeninagriculture
#ranchwife
“From behind, it’s just three cowboys and a sea of “From behind, it’s just three cowboys and a sea of fuzzy cows—but in that moment, there’s so much more. Cowboys, side by side, talking, laughing, and soaking in the long, dusty day of branding. These days are hard, no doubt, but it’s moments like this that make all the work feel worth it. Somewhere between the dust and the conversation, family happens. This is ranch life: long days, full hearts, and the simple joy of doing it all together.”

.	#LifeOnACattleRanch
.	#MarriedToARancher
.	#FamilyOnTheRange
.	#CattleCrew
.	#BrandingDayVibes
Life is too short to wait for something to happen Life is too short to wait for something to happen to you.  I chose to jump into life with two feet and make it an adventure. 

The only problem is that sometimes life wants to tug on you in two different directions. Missing out on things at the ranch brings on a real case of FOMO. I live for these kind of days and it’s hard when the whole operation can’t revolve around me. 

In these moments, it’s a mental choice to be where my shoes are. Wishing I was somewhere else doesn’t solve anything, it just lets the memories I could be making slip by. Earning a state championship title with my girls was not something worth missing, even for a beautiful day sitting cows in the range. 

#lifeonacattleranch 
#marriedtoarancher 
#bewhereyouare 
#bepresentinthemoment 
#statechamps
Romance doesn’t always come by candlelight. We ha Romance doesn’t always come by candlelight.

We had dinner reservations that night.
The cows had other ideas.

And somewhere between the dust, the frustration, and the manure on my fancy clothes, I was reminded of something.

Love out here isn’t separate from the work.
It’s built inside of it.

It’s built when you both run toward the problem.
When you adjust the plan.
When you show up anyway.

Two hands.
One direction.

There’s a longer version of this story on the blog — but this might be my favorite part of it.

#lifeonacattleranch
#marriedtoarancher
#ranchlife
#westernmarriage
#builtinthework
Roses are red, Violets are blue, We had Valentine’ Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
We had Valentine’s plans…
But the cows broke through!

Boots polished, hair in place,
Dressed up for our night,
Reservations waiting
Under the city lights.

But then we saw them—
Or maybe we didn’t,
A herd of wild backsides
Slipping out of sight.

Nothing says romance
Like a runaway cow chase,
Down the winding highway,
Our hearts already start to race.

Flying out of the pickup
Before it came to a stop,
I’m fairly certain
The Rancher thought I was hot.

Finally to dinner,
Out in the town,
With a hint of manure
Dusting my cowgirl gown.

Maybe this is romance,
Rough, wild, and true—
A night just for us,
Until the cows break through.

Happy Valentines from The Idaho Ranchers Wife!

#marriedtoarancher 
#lifeonacattleranch 
#ranchlifehumor 
#valentineranchstyle 
#loveandlivestock
Every handle has a purpose. Every hand knows the w Every handle has a purpose. Every hand knows the work

#marriedtoarancher 
#lifeonacattleranch 
#HandsOnTheLand 
#RanchLifeBW 
#BehindTheBrand
Confidence comes early. Experience takes longer. Confidence comes early. Experience takes longer.

Some days, I watch our little rancher ride along and marvel at how certain he is about everything. Which pivot should be on or off, which cows should have moved yesterday… the commentary never stops. And yet, he’s learning something quietly bigger than any instruction: that there isn’t one right way to do this work.

Ranching, like parenting, like life, has room for mistakes, experimentation, and figuring out your right way.

There’s more than one right way — and the best one is the one that works for you.

To read more, find the link in my bio. 

#lifeonacattleranch
#marriedtoarancher 
#confidenceplusexperience 
#therightway 
#ranchlife
I used to think standing out was the goal—not to b I used to think standing out was the goal—not to be better, just to feel unique.

Now I’m realizing how freeing it is to be who you are without separating yourself from everyone else.

Ordinary isn’t small.
It’s grounded.
And you can still stand out—
even when you’re part of the herd.

#MarriedToARancher
#LifeOnACattleRanch
#Belonging
#QuietConfidence
#EnoughAsYouAre
On a ranch, learning is rarely free. Sometimes the On a ranch, learning is rarely free.
Sometimes the cost is time. Sometimes pride. Occasionally, far more than we expected.

I learned that the hard way years ago, running an old red swather I was sure I had mastered — until confidence outran attention and the lesson arrived all at once.

Now, I watch my kids learn in their own ways. A six-year-old eager for his turn on the tractor. A teenager discovering that even good runs don’t last forever. Different moments, same truth: experience doesn’t spare us from mistakes — it simply gives them more context.

This week’s story sits with those lessons. With paying attention. With letting people learn. And with why the lessons that cost us something are often the ones that stay.

•	#lifeonacattleranch
•	#marriedtoarancher
•	#raisingcowboys
•	#learningthehardway
•	#ranchraised
Every morning is a quiet invitation to start again Every morning is a quiet invitation to start again.
To notice more. To assume less.
To pay attention to what’s working and what needs adjusting.

It’s a reminder that experience doesn’t mean we’re finished learning — only that we’re willing to keep showing up.

#lifeonacattleranch
#marriedtoarancher 
#freshstart 
#ontheopenrange 
#learnsomethingnew
Saying we went out to “check water” never is just Saying we went out to “check water” never is just about checking water when we are out on the range. 

It doesn’t say anything about bumping across the range, guessing which road to take when I’m in the drivers seat(and making a U-turn when I guess wrong), or helping a wayward sheep find its own herd. 

We never know what our weekly water checks bring, but I can only hope I get the nap next time. 

	•	#lifeonacattleranch
	•	#marriedtoarancher
	•	#RanchWork
	•	#RangeLife
	•	#WorkingRanch
Ranch life isn’t all wide-open spaces and sunsets. Ranch life isn’t all wide-open spaces and sunsets.

Sometimes it’s a very close inspection from someone who clearly doesn’t believe in personal space.

Like Connie. She doesn’t believe in personal space. And we love her anyway. 
 
#ranchlife #lifeontherange #everydayranching #lifeonacattleranch #marriedtoarancher 

Wide open or up close and personal— we choose this life both ways.
Some days look like work. Some look like play. Mos Some days look like work.
Some look like play.
Most are both.

#RanchLife
#LearningByDoing
#RaisedOutside
#LifeOnaCattleRanch
#MarriedToaRancher
Everyone has a story to tell, and I’ve learned tha Everyone has a story to tell, and I’ve learned that I love sharing mine. From funny moments with my kids to my own personal struggles, every chapter matters to me.

Stories like…

…how I always wanted to marry a cowboy—and I did. It looks much different than I imagined—less trees and more desert, for sure—but somehow it’s even better than I ever dreamed.

…how feeding cows every. single. day. might look like our own version of Groundhog Day, yet I look forward to the consistency, the daily check-ins, and the simple reason to head out with the herd.

…how I never learned to rope before meeting my husband, and how determined I’ve been to learn. Some days I was terrified to set my loop up, afraid of messing up or making a scene—but the satisfaction of actually doing it always outweighs the fear.

…how, even as a little girl, my soul yearned to be out working with my dad on the ranch. It was nothing for me to abandon playtime in the yard for work time in the fields.

…how my life is built on choices. I don’t have to be on the ranch—I choose it, because I love the work and being part of something bigger than myself.

These aren’t milestones or a timeline. They’re glimpses of life as I live it.
A story I can’t wait to share more of.
Winter slows things down enough to notice what usu Winter slows things down enough to notice what usually gets overlooked.

On the ranch, progress is rarely dramatic. It’s built quietly, one small decision at a time.

Read more about tradition, stewardship, and the small changes that shape an operation over time. You can find the link in my bio.

#ranchlife #AgLife #stewardship #lifeonacattleranch #marriedtoarancher
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